Nothing drains the vibrancy of a woman faster then the worry for a suffering child.
The ability to communicate is not an easy task for a child. Yet quite amazingly at a very early age, they develop their own communication system to gain access to what ever they may desire. At first their method consists simply of crying or smiling, two simple methods easily understood to communicate their personal needs. However, with each new phase of growth appears a different method with a whole new set of rules, leaving us, the parent, sometimes confused, and unfortunately without an updated book of instruction.
The only sure tactic that we have is to pay close attention to their outward actions and attitudes. I have found that no matter what the age, these two aspects, (actions and mental attitudes) offer more accurate clues, each playing a huge role in deciphering the child’s process of communication. As the adult, we try diligently to listen and pay close attention, as we translate and decode the child’s emotional energy. Victory is felt when communication seems agreeable, satisfying and understandable to both parties; yet, unaware to us the child on some level still feels unheard.
Nine times out of ten the foundational, emotional, inner needs have unsuccessfully been expressed by the child; not because of lack of trying, but because of the lack of understanding on both parties, A parent has to listen with their eyes, their sense of feeling, their intuition and their ears; always alert to draw out the hidden messages of a story being told and acting out in their attitude of everyday living.
As a young mother of six, my greatest desire was to meet my children’s physical and emotional needs. I learned alternative health to beat the war on Allergies, Strep and other health issues. I home schooled. I gave them opportunities to learn leadership through involvement in service and community events. We played sports, took dance and music lessons. We had a strong and active religious foundation. So basically, I like most mothers, strived daily to raise a family with happy, healthy children.
I felt we had a perfect life, sharing some wonderful times together. Yes, we had some ups and downs, but what family didn’t? I put in much effort working hard to offer my children opportunities to develop faith and integrity. But with all that I desired to offer them, I wasn’t aware, and didn’t understand the enormous pull between reaction and result, that was driven by our basic seven emotional needs. I didn’t have an understanding of the impact created by the absence of these needs, nor the direct affect on a person.
Then one day, totally out of the blue, I found myself confronted with a child who began to struggle with personal identity, anger, disregard for rules and threatening to leave home at too young of an age. I began to question my parenting abilities, where did I go wrong? I was confused, frustrated and didn’t understand. I thought our family fit the typical “happy family” mold, you know the one….”work hard to do all the right things, and everything will turn out perfectly”.
As far as I could see, we were communicating well and having those heart to heart talks, where parent and child are both on the same page. But somewhere I missed a very important message, one that hit me by surprise and quickly turned my life upside down. Yes, I had been listening, but unaware that I was not accurately tuning in, I missed some important information to the personal inner needs and struggles of this child. My life was moving happily along, until trauma hit me square in the face.
Most children will try their best to communicate, but they too can be unaware of the quiet messages held deep in the subconscious mind. For this reason a parent greatly benefits from knowing a few simple processes that open pathways for deeper levels of expression. One such process is Sand Talk (see video), a process that helps one to communicate through visual communication.
Through this process one’s story begins to unfold, offering the listener a clear and deeper level of understanding. Great skills of communication will unlock as you begin to rely more on your intuitive insights to partner with your physical ears. This knowledge has given me freedom from destructively, hidden perceptions; opening and offering a much richer and deeper relationship with all my children.
At this time, all but 2 are grown and off creating a beautiful life of their own. A mother never stop loving her children, and children, no matter what age, never stop needing their mother. Distance may come between the two, but has no barring on my ability to still intuitively hear and respond to their needs. I am grateful to be their mother and for the respect and love that my children offer me. I am grateful for the mind which God has created within all of us, and the freedom to use its powerful ability to raise the body’s energetic vibrancy for a much healthier, happier life.
Tomorrow…”Mom, can you really hear me?” Part 2.