Every where I turn, someone is speaking of wanting or needing to have a more balanced life. They feel a struggle over maintaining a balance between work and family. Their honest desire to succeed, or keep up a good appearance, guides their mode of thinking into believing that there must be a compromise between the two. Something has to give so that the other can be accomplished, producing worry and fear over what type of consequences could crop up.
Now what appears to be two masters, each dictating personal attention, forms a continual teeter-totter effect as the person attempt to stretch between the two. Recognize it or not, we all have a deep inner desire to be in total control, feeling that we can “juggle all the balls”. This behavior quickly creates a person who is overly tired and irritable forming a vicious cycle of trying to please. To our dismay, no matter how hard we try, there is always someone or something either feeling or being ignored.
The easiest way to stop this circus act, is to recognize ones inner “control freak”. You know, the one who says, “I can do it….” taking every job and task that directly or indirectly comes your way; hiding inside, disguising itself as the “super-human, accomplishing machine”.
Possibly, we have all had some success at making small improvements by changing an attitude or behavior; but the major, profound difference happens when there is a total paradigm shift – a new thinking model.
For you this new model may consist of trusting the strengths and talents of others, allowing them to participate and take a more active role. You may find that instead of being the head chief, cook, and bottle washer – basically doing everything; you become part of an advisory board, a partnership, mastering the ability of working together. You develop the ability to see through another’s eyes, opening a new perspective and sense of responsibility. Now instead of seeing yourself as being torn between two good and worthwhile roles in life, you begin to focus on your higher purpose, realizing that this new shift in thinking illuminates the feeling that some compromise needs to be made.
Developing this new model makes it easier to recognize the work “needs” to be done, the work that “can” be done, and the work that “shouldn’t” be done. The work that “needs” to be done – you can accomplish in a reasonable amount of time – the things that will move you forward the fastest. The work that “can” be done are items that you can resource out to another using their skills and talents to get twice as much done. And the work that “shouldn’t” be done, you no longer feel that inner perception which once chained you like a slave of having to do things to please or win praise.
Sounds like a simple solution, definitely the most powerful solution…. Make a paradigm shift. Create a new thinking model.
Today’s affirmation: “I am forming a strong team! – A board of advisers”